I have no idea what I’m doing. The Holy Spirit said, “build a website and share what I tell you to,” and I have been blundering my way through Bluehost/Wordpress ever since. Am I the only one that wishes sometimes that God would take a cue from “The Shoemaker and the Elves” and you’d wake up the next morning with all your problems fixed? Yeah, the Holy Spirit shot that idea down quickly: “then you wouldn’t learn anything,” He said serenely. Anyways, here’s the journal entry for one of the last major hiccups I had before the initial website finally went live:
4/23/25
I messed up the website today, and now I don’t know how to make it right…uggh. Then I way overdid it trying to fix it and now here I am, a sick bundle of angst.
So I run to Yahweh’s lap to confess and ask Him to fix this thing in me that strives in my own strength and overreaches, then feels stressed when I mess things up.
I feel silly and annoyed with myself but Yahweh is holding me close and is smiling brighter and brighter as I pray. Confused, I ask Him why He’s doting on me as though I just did something brilliant.
“Because you came to Me first. And you didn’t just ask Me to fix the situation, but to fix you as well. Now we are really getting somewhere with this project,” He says, a glimmer of triumph lighting His face.
Epiphany
And then it hit me, “the project” is me, it has been all along. God cares less about what the outcome looks like than what I am learning along the way. We are building much more than just a website, we are building a working relationship.
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